Broken Glasses.

Have you ever dropped a glass and broken it? Sometimes it just breaks off in one big piece, sometimes it shatters into a hundred little ones that you find with your foot many days later. No matter the way it broke, it is no less broken. No matter if it cracked or shattered it can no longer hold water. I have been feeling very broken, I am a cracked glass. You may not see me as a hundred peices on the floor, and I may not stick you in the foot, but that doesnt change the way things are. You get to a point where you are not even sure what to say about it. The choice is not to be made, you want to close your eyes and wake up sometime later when these problems do not even exist anymore as opposed to facing the possibility of them playing out. My problems are small. They will be nothing in the long run, keep them in perspective, be positive. All these things are mentally true to me but everything else that makes me, me screams this is it! It's the end of the world how will you ever get past this giant road block? My problems are nothing to anyone else but me. So what do I do with this cracked glass? What is there to learn and what is there to do? What is the right thing and what is the mistake. Do I go big and dramatic and change up everything and see where the wind takes me or do I sit back like a spectator and wait for the natural course of time to change things? Would my adventure be a success or a failure? Would waiting patciently by change everything or change nothing?
I am a planner and I need to know everything that goes on in my life, and everything that is going to go on so I can have it scheduled and prepaired for. I do not like being caught off guard but it seems to be that life's favorite thing to do to people like me is to catch you off guard. You have plans? Let's upset them. You think you are doing this? Well, no longer. The Who, What, Where, When, and Why's of life haunt me. They distress me. They Weigh 400 lbs each and sit on the couch of my heart eating pop corn, nuts, and watching reality TV shows while cackling at the dismay they find in the charecters.
What am I to do.
Get off my couch or I'm calling the repo man.